Puh-lease. Ralph Lauren takes near-anorexic models and slices them to stick figures.
Frozen dinners fresh from the microwave resemble camel puke, while the meal on the box looks like 5 star restaurant fare.
How about those profiles and pictures on Match.com? Every one is a young, active, cosmopolitan/achiever/tri-athlete/neurosurgeon/millionaire with a Steeplechase smile and an ass you can crack eggs on. Sure.
It's a gimmicked world. Get used to it. And no demographic is more deserving of a little image enhancement than school kids. Time will ravage our faces and bludgeon our joie de vivre. Who isn't entitled to some retroactive cosmetic enhancements?
We decided to indulge in a little Photoshop sorcery ourselves. The first reader to recognize the subject of this school portrait will win our approbation and a free Photoshop job on the image of their choice. We might even reveal his/her identity in our next post.
In the interest of transparency, truth and full disclosure, we at VMG confess we've been less than honest with our own portraits. We work with some very prestigious clients and felt compelled to fudge our images a smidge, just to give us a bit more age and gravitas.
Below are our authentic selves.
Larry Bleidner Bruce McArthur
We apologize for the deception.
Please love us just the way we are.